Book Recommendations

The man and woman are at the front of the auditorium. There’s burlap, lace, candles, and flowers scattered across the stage. The preacher holds his Bible. It’s showtime.

“If there be any here, who can give a reason why this man and woman should not be joined, speak now or forever hold your peace!” the preacher says.

No one ever says anything at this point, unless you’re in a romantic movie and the girl is marrying the jerk. But in this scene, an old man pipes up from the back with a strange question:

“How do you know – I mean, really know – that this marriage is going to work?”

An interesting question. What makes marriage actually work? What makes it last? Is it a good upbringing? Simply, “being in love”? Being compatible? Having enough money? Reading enough books?

This is the scene that Dave Harvey sets up in the beginning of his book, When Sinners Say, “I Do.” And he sets out to answer the interesting question by saying that ultimately none of those options will make a marriage last.

He submits that “What we believe about God determines the quality of our marriage.”

In other words, the key to a healthy marriage is a healthy understanding of who God is, what the Gospel is, and who we are. Knowing the truth about those three realities grounds our marriage in something stable and secure.

The book is, in my opinion, one of the best marriage books out there. Why? Because it doesn’t just jump into the practical. “Here’s three quick steps to make your marriage wonderful!” Somehow, that never works for us.

But this book starts with the Gospel and shows how that truth clarifies everything. Marriage is nothing more than two sinners coming together. A Christian marriage is still two sinners coming together, but sinners who are in this process of sanctification. And in that process, God shows them both great mercy – and they are called to show that same mercy to each other, no matter the frustrations and clashes of married life. After all, as Dave Harvey says, “Mercy sweetens marriage.”

If you’ve been looking for a helpful resource to ground your marriage in the Gospel, I encourage you to pick up this book and enjoy it together with your spouse. You can find it at our Resource Center every Sunday morning before and after the service for $11.